طنزنوشته های رویا صدر

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شنبه
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مامان بي رحمم!امروز عصر وقتي سر آن سي دي به من گير سه پيچ دادي و از من گرفتيش،خيلي از دست تو عصباني و دلخور

شدم.مخصوصا اين كه سي دي مال خودم نبود و مهم تر اين كه جلوي همسايه آپارتمان روبرويي كه داشت توي خانه ما را نگاه مي كرد،آن

جوري ضايعم كردي.اين زندگي آپارتماني هم عجب چيز خفني است!اي كاش توي يك باغ يا بيابان يا كوير يا اقيانوس يا سياره ديگر آن

حرفهاي آخر ضد حال را به من زده بودي تا هيچكس شاهد خرد شدن تك تك تارهاي اعصابم نباشد.در همان لحظه بود كه تصميم گرفتم به

طور بسيار جدي خودم را بكشم و راحت شوم.اين بود كه رفتم توي اتاقم و در را محكم روي خودم بستم،طوري كه شير دستشويي صداي شر

و شرش بلند شد و بر خفني فضاي آپارتمان يك چيزي اضافه كرد.مامان جان!بهتر نبود به جاي اين كه به من گير بدهي،زورت به بابا مي رسيد

و مي گفتي كه شير را درست كند تا اينطوري وقت و بي وقت باز نشود و الكي سر و صدا راه نياندازد؟اصلا چرا مرا بدنيا آوردي و چرا

شرايط روحي مرا درك نمي كني و چرا من بايد شب امتحان فيزيك از مبحث چگالي،به مساله اي مثل خود كشي فكر كنم؟البته مي دانم

چرا،چون شما نسل دومي هستيد و ما دو نسل،تلقي مان راجع به همه چي از جمله دموكراسي و عشق و دمپايي و حكومت با هم فرق مي

كند.امشب كه بزرگترين تصميم زندگيم را گرفتم،بيشتر اين تفاوت مشخص مي شود.آن وقت شما توي دفتر خاطرات من،اين نامه ها را پيدا مي

كنيد و مي خوانيد و دلتان مي سوزد.

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يكشنبه
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مامان بي تفاوتم!ديشب تا آمدم راجع به بزرگترين تصميم زندگيم برنامه ريزي كنم،صدايم كرديد و رشته افكارم را پاره نموديد،آن قدر كه فقط

توانستم اين دفترچه را زير تخت قايم كنم.بابا با بي رحمي هر چه تمام تر مرا تا پاي ميز كشاند كه شام بخورم و تو هم نه تنها هيچ كاري

نكردي،بلكه رفتي توي آشپزخانه كه كفگير و ملاقه بياوري و مثلا تريپ بي تفاوتي بزني .بابا از تو پرسيد كه:«اين بچه چه مرگش است؟»وتو

هم جواب دادي كه هيچي ،و حتي به او نگفتي كه من بچه نيستم و چهارده سالم است و من در اند بدبختي دست و پا زدم و بي سر و صدا،در

اعماق قلبم اشك ريختم و خورش آلواسفناج با سالاد فصل خوردم و نتوانستم بگويم كه تو سر يك سي دي چه بلايي سر من آوردي.چون اگر

مي گفتم،بابا مي گفت كه من خيلي هم غلط كرده ام سي دي فلان آورده ام و به تو مي گفت خانوم اصلا تقصير شماست و آن وقت دوباره شير

دستشويي شروع مي كرد به شرشر و من از اين شير دستشويي و از اين خانه و از اين ديوار و از اين قاشق و چنگال و كفگير و خلاصه هر

چه رنگ تعلق پذيرد متنفرم و آزادم و مي خواهم آزاد باشم و فردا شب بزرگترين تصميم زندگيم را مي گيرم تا شما دلتان بسوزد.چون الآن

خوابم مي آيد و سرم سنگين شده و كمي براي تصميم گيري دير است...

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دوشنبه
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مامان نسل دومي من!تا آن سي دي را به من پس ندهي،من هم روي تصميم خودم ايستاده ام،و تصميم من هم اين است كه مي خواهم هر چه

سريع تر تصميمي در زندگيم بگيرم،توپ.اند تصميم.حالا ديشب نتوانستم،امشب.مامان!يا مي خواهم خودكشي كنم،يا فرار كنم،يا مجموعه اشعارم
را كه در سبك پست مدرن مي باشد چاپ كنم(با خرج شخصيم)،يا هنرپيشه بشوم و در سريالهاي تلويزيوني ،نقش دختر دم بخت را بازي كنم كه

در آشپزخانه سبزي پاك مي كند و در فراق معشوق، آه مي كشد.تا بدين وسيله از تو و بابا و همه نسل دومي ها و اصلا همه دنيا انتقام بگيرم،تا

شما باشيد و اين طوري با احساسات پاك من بازي نكنيد. مي دانم وقتي بابا بشنود كه من همه اين كارها را كرده ام،تريپ روشنفكري نسل

دومي مي زند و مي گويد:ما چهارده ساله كه بوديم،كاپيتال و مانيفيست مي خوانديم و نقشه مي كشيديم كه دنيا را زير و رو كنيم و سراسر كوير

لوت و نمك را يونجه بكاريم.مامان و بابا!دنيايتان مال خودتان!هر چقدر مي خواهيد،كلنگش بزنيد و آبش بدهيد.سرتاسرش را هم بكنيد شبدر و

يونجه.من توي زندگي خودم مانده ام،چه برسد به دنيا.براي همين مي خواهم هر چه زودتر بزرگترين تصميم زندگيم را بگيرم،و تا سي دي را

پس ندهيد،روي تصميم خودم هستم و وقتي اين يادداشتها را مي خوانيد كه ديگر خيلي دير شده است...

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سه شنبه
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مامان ضد حالم!من فوتبال را دوست دارم.من ديويد بكهام را دوست دارم.من به مباحث تئوريك مربوط به سينما علاقه زياد دارم.من تام كروز

را دوست دارم.لئوناردو دي كاپريو را هم دوست دارم.چون همه شان روشنفكر و خوش تيپ و هنرمندند و در سطوح بسيار بالا در هاليوود و

منچستر يونايتد بازي مي كنند.نه مثل ما،در پيتي.از فيدل كاسترو كه يك زماني الگوي نسل شما بوده،بدم مي آيد،با آن ريش جوادي اش .اين

حرفها را بارها بهت گفته ام.تو هم جواب داده اي كه فكر آدمها مهم است و تاثيري كه روي جريان بشريت داشته اند،نه قيافه شان.مامان،تو و

نسل دومي ها كه اينقدر افه فكر كردن مي آييد،كجاي دنيا را گرفتيد؟و چه دردي را از بشريتتان دوا كرديد؟خوش به حال خودم.فكرم اين است

كه بايد فردا-الان كه خوابم مي آيد و پنچرم-يك فكر اساسي بكنم و از اين زندگي و دنيا و چهارچوب و محدوديت خلاص شوم.

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چهارشنبه
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مامان جان!يك نفر اگر بعدها اين دفتر دستش برسد و اين حرفها را بخواند،با خودش مي گويد كه آيا يك سي دي اينقدر مهم است؟در جوابش

بايد بگويم كه نخير،خود يك سي دي اينقدر مهم نيست(البته سي دي من مهم بود،چون مال امانت بود و غير مجاز بود و تك بود)ولي مساله

مهم ،ظلمي است كه به من نسل سومي مي رود.مامان،تو من را نمي فهمي.وقتي جلوي ديگران حرف مي زنم ، چپ چپ نگاهم مي كني و

زود حرف را عوض مي كني تا خوب سكه يك پول بشوم.تو به مدل موهايم ايراد مي گيري،به رنگ سايه ام ايراد مي گيري،به مدل پاچه

شلوارم توهين مي كني.ايراد مي گيري كه چرا تلفن را براي يك ساعت اشغال كرده ام(در حالي كه معمولا سه ربع بيشتر هم طول نمي

كشد)ايراد مي گيري كه چرا وقتم را يك ساعت پاي اينترنت براي چت كردن تلف كردهام،در حالي كه اصلا چت نكرده ام و من فقط نيم ساعت

سايت مربوط به اسكار رفته بودم براي اين كه عكس نيكول كيدمن را كپي كنم،آخرش هم نشد.ايراد مي گيري كه چرا صداي نوار را آن قدر

بلند كرده ام كه همسايه بالايي با قند شكن به سقفمان مي كوبد؟همسايه بالايي از نسل دوم كه هيچي،از نسل صفرم هم نيست.او،به صداي پاي

مورچه توي كيسه زباله هم ايراد مي گيرد،چه برسد به اين كه مرا درك كند.آن وقت تو،به جاي اين كه طرف من را بگيري،از او طرفداري

مي كني.حالا اين همه حرف را براي چي زدم؟ براي اين كه بگويم يك سي دي خيلي مهم است و من برايش حاضرم بميرم و يا حداقل تصميم

مهم زندگيم را بگيرم.

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پنجشنبه
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مامان جان!من امروز حرف نمي زنم.بعدها كه يادداشتهايم به دستت رسيد،خيال نكني كه از حرفم كوتاه آمده بودم.نخير،سكوت سرشار از ناگفته
هاست(اين جمله را يك جايي خوانده ام و مال خودم نيست.)

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جمعه
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مامان جون!آخ جون،آخ جون!از تو ممنونم كه روي خاله ناهيد رو زمين نيانداختي و سي دي را به او پس دادي.اين خاله ناهيد اند مرام است.

درست است كه نسل سومي نيست،ولي دو تا و نصفي كه هست.او بود كه گفت حرفهايم را در رابطه با سي دي و دنيا و زندگي و مد مي فهمد

و او بود كه گفت احتياج نيست خودكشي كنم يا فرار كنم يا شعر چاپ كنم يا بروم و هنرپيشه بشوم.چون سي دي را برايم پس مي گيرد تا آن را

بدهم صاحبش. من هم روي عرش پرواز مي كنم و داخل آسانسور مي شوم تا سي دي را پس بدهم.زندگي چقدر زيباست!

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شنبه
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مامان بي رحمم!امروز عصر وقتي سر آن نوار ويدئو به من گير سه پيچ دادي،يك هفته به خودم وقت دادم كه......

**********************************************************************************توضيح نويسنده:مطلب فوق،قاطي روزنامه هاي بساط نمكي دوره گردي،پيدا و سپس استخراج شده است و جملات آخر،به علت پارگي اوراق

دفترچه،ناتمام مانده است.بدين وسيله از خوانندگان گرامي تقاضا مي شود اگر از بقيه اوراق دفترچه فوق اطلاعي دارند،اينجا بنويسند و

وبلاگستاني را از نگراني برهانند! نويسنده بنا دارد سرگذشت را ادامه دهد و نمي خواهد خداي ناكرده در اين ميان تحريفي تاريخي صورت

گيرد....

نظرات (46)

ن.ت.خ:

واقعاً... واقعاً دردآور است. تازه شما خيلي موجه نوشتيد وگرنه برخي دغدغه‌هاي سطحي و خيلي عجيب‌تر از اينها دارند. هر چه نسل‌ها هم پيش مي‌روند تهي‌تر مي شوند و كم‌مطالعه‌تر... ماي بيچاره كي دغدغه‌ي ازدواج بريتني‌اسپيرز يا مدل لباس جنيفر لويز را داشتيم؟ ما بوديم و يك جهان شورش و كشتار و جنگ به اضافه‌ي امكانات كم مطالعه و فرصت‌هاي كم براي زندگي. ولي حالا؟....اما با اين وجود شخصاً خوشبينم كه در ميان اين نسل بي‌هويت و معلق و حيران، افرادي هم پيدا خواهند شد كه آينده را بسازند... يعني شايد بهتر است خوشبين باشيم وگرنه روي آب نمي‌شود خانه ساخت.

Posted by ن.ت.خ | December 27, 2004 7:55 PM

فرهنگ:

اين خاطرات می‌تواند با کمی تغيير در اصطلاحات، نوشته‌های يک جوان پيش از انقلاب باشد. فکر و ذکر اکثر جوانان پيش از انقلاب، پيکان جوانان، نوار داريوش، شلوار پاچه‌گشاد فالمرز، عينک ری‌بن و ريش ستاری بود. (البته مذکرهايش، در مورد مو نث‌ها چيزهايی در همين رديف). اما همين جوانان در زمان انقلاب ناگهان همگی منقلب شدند، به خيابانها ريختند، سرگرمی‌اشان قايم‌موشک بازی با حکومت نظامی شد و با همان پيکان جوانان زخمی‌ها را به بيمارستان منتقل می‌کردند. نتيجه‌گيری "فرهنگی" : رفتار اشخاص منشعب از محيط اطرافشان است.

Posted by فرهنگ | December 28, 2004 12:07 AM

شاسکول خان:

بابا شما که نسل ششمی هستین! جدی میگم.
نسل من این حرفها رو خورد و ساخت. باز دم تریبون وبلاگ گرم. ولی یه سئوال؟ با فرزند خود و نکرانی از شیطنتش چه میکنی؟ این معیار من برای شیطنت هست

Posted by شاسکول خان | December 28, 2004 3:07 AM

yalda:

وااااااای دوباره خودکشی؟!...

پر کردن فاصله زیادی که بین این دونسل افتاده کار مشکلیه.........

Posted by yalda | December 28, 2004 10:53 AM

دختر كولي:

من هنوزم معتقدم كه تو مال هر نسل چندمي كه باشي ... شاهكاري

Posted by دختر كولي | December 28, 2004 11:45 AM

بوی تلخ قهوه - کسری:

سلام بی بی جان.
کار خودت را کردی ؟ روزها بود که نخندیده بودم اما مگر میشود با این نوشته نخندی ؟ الحق که قلمت سزاوار همان آبدارخانه گل آقایی ست !
راستی در گردون همسایه شدیم !

Posted by بوی تلخ قهوه - کسری | December 28, 2004 5:54 PM

ostad charandi:

kheili ziyad bod kamiro khondim jaleb bod

Posted by ostad charandi | December 28, 2004 10:41 PM

پاييزان:

پوووووف. آدم خنده‌اش مي‌گيرد به اين فکرها. حيف که پيدا مي‌شود آدمي که اين‌طور زندگي را به بازي بگيرد. وگرنه يک دل ِ سير مي‌خنديدم.

Posted by پاييزان | December 30, 2004 6:05 PM

خواجه‌پور:

دستتون درد نکنه
مثل این که این چند وقت افتاده‌اید توی خط نقیضه یکی دو تا فکر کنم خوب جا برای کار کردن دارد.
ا. سرمقاله‌ و مقلات قوچانی و خبرنگارتان که کنسروی از اطلاعات است.
2. لحن پوزش‌خواهانه ابطحی و هک شدن پیاپی سایتش
3. نبوی در انواع مختلف
و... دیگر هم که خودتان استاد هستید.

Posted by خواجه‌پور | January 1, 2005 2:22 AM

سکوت مرگ:

اومدم اینجا یه حال و هوایی عوض کنم ...بدتر حالم گرفته شد .امیدوارم همیشه شاد باشییییی

Posted by سکوت مرگ | January 1, 2005 8:46 AM

clintoen:

خودت را کردی ؟ روزها بود که نخندیده بودم اما مگر میشود با این نوشته نخندی ؟ الحق که قلمت سزاوار همان آبدارخانه گل آقایی ست !
راستی در گردون همسایه شدیم !

Posted by clintoen | February 3, 2005 8:43 AM

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